Rage is good for keeping a person alive. You gotta have something to get up for in the morning, something to fight for. Human nature, the nature of life itself, is to fight the unwinnable fight against the darkness, against entropy and hate and the sheer unfathomable un-feeling-ness of the vacuum of space.

Perhaps everyone else feels exactly the same darkness…. I don’t know, I can’t know, I have only ever felt what I feel. But something in me says I was never destined for an easy life, I was always gonna swim against the current.

All life experiences this. On the one hand, there is the entropy of time and a finite lifespan. On the other, other life forms, your species or others, will get in your way. And you must fight, or die.

But I also feel like… Not all of the exceptionalism I thought I had as a Mormon is false.